Welcome to the World of Idiosyncrasies

Hello and Welcome to my world. Here, you are free to feel as you feel without guarding your emotions, without acting matured and rational etc etc etc. Its an idiosyncratic world and you have every right to feel happy, sad, upset, cheerful, grumpy or whatever else you feel like! No judgements at all.
Oh, and while you enter, please leave you judgmental thinking, and stuck up attitude outside. It's a mad world in here already; and the least you could do is not add to the troubles. No one loves a drama llama ;)

Sunday, October 7, 2007


Kisko hisaab doon?
Raah chalte log maangtey hain
Ghar aati hoon
Apne bhi maangtey hain
Office jaati hoon
Toh sahayogi aur seniors bhi
Naam poochtey hain
Haal poochtey hain
Aage peechey agal bagal
Jhaanktey hain
Prashnon ke cheentey uchhaaltey hain
Main avaak...
Kya uttar doon??
Wo isse maun sehmati maan
Aarop bhi lagatey hain
Mera "main" chadha bazaar mein,
Boliyaan lagti hain..
Mera mann tull raha hai
Vyaktitva ho gaya hai khokhla,
Kamaye saare yash pheekey
Shram bekaar...
Aarop ho gaye hain damdaar wazandaar...
Meri zindagi meri nahi,
Apna dhang apni shailly..
Tulaa pe tool gayee hoon
Aur log hisaab maangtey hain...
Kisko hisaab doon?

Unhe pata nahi
Maine har din apne ko
Apni tulaa par rakhkar
Toley hain apne armaan aur aarzoo
Saare sapney
Aur tumharey woh bhaari bharkam aarop
Meri tulaa par halke saabit huye
Kisko hisaab doon??

Main Gandhari......

Tum chahte the
Main gandhari bani rahoon
Aankhon pe pattiyan baandh loon....
Maine pattiyan baandh li
Kaano se suna, aahaton se jaana
Hone lage bhrashtachar, anarth, apmaan
Juloos aur naare
Sweth vastron ke peechey
Chipey kaarnaamey kaale
Bhookh se tadapte
Dahshath se kaanpte
Mahamaari se bilbilate
Joojhte marte nireeh jeev....
Aantank...kewal aatank!!
Yehi sab nah dikhane ke liye
Tumne mujhse chhal kiya
Gandhari banaya...
Nah dekhne ki sazaa di??
Kaash! Main pattiyan nah baandhti
Kar jaati tumhari avhelna,
Toh shayad yeh Mahabharat nah hota;
Dharti ko yeh sazza nah miltee....

Saturday, October 6, 2007

Questions Unanswered

The lab class
70 laptops, the teachers assignment
The hum of the fan
The buzz of the class,
A tranquility all around....

Is that it
Or is there more?
Tranquility all around
Or the calm before the storm?
They say its what you percieve....

Friends and foes
Joys and woes
Whats the truth behind it all?
Faces - diverging and converging,
Different and yet all the same....

Once a friend
Is always a friend,
Thats what they said to me.
But the world sings a different song
Words of which i know not....

Who am i?
Who are u?
Why are we here?
Questions, questions and some more questions!!
Questions unanswered....

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

tht scared me

Heyy....hi everyone!! Kno wht happened a few minutes ago?? My landlady is out and shez this super female who thinks u need to be a rocket scientist to know how to operate the aquaguard...so she locks the kitchen behind her!! Poor me!! So i keep the water in a covered bucket!! Today, as i was about to refill my bottle, wt do i see?? This huuuugggggeeee rodent sitting on top of the bucket!! And jesus!! Its half dead......im scared out of my wits!! So wht do i do?? I shout!! As loud as my vocal chords would allow me!! The next door neighbour comes out and she calls the watchman who gets rid of the creepy creature. Thank god!! My neighbour is sweet though!! She also gives me two bottles of water so that so that i can manage for the night and asks me to return for more in the morning. Thats generous of her! Specially keeping the fact in mind that my landlady takes extra care not to talk to "petty housewives" like her. Well!! I wonder what i would have been doing if this "petty housewife" hadnt come forward to help in response to my shrieks.
Rest the day was as usual. Went to my insti but attendence in class was jus about 30% because of some kind of Jharkhand bandh. I am happy today. Got my tickets done for going home during the Puja vacations. The only advantage that we had because of the bandh was that the lab classes got cancelled. But...one of my favourite proffs....he teaches Statistics, failed to turn up too!! Today, i was reading about Conflict management in Orkut....really made me think. I think i want ot explore this field a little more. And rest is usual....my roomie is thinking abt quitting the insti, says she cant handle the pressure anymore. I think thats jackshit of an excuse. She never wanted to do this in the first place.....so y come?? If you cant convince yourself of ur capabilities, hw do u expect people to have faith in you??

Monday, August 20, 2007

bak again

Hey!! Im bak again....bak to blog or back to bug!! wteva!! actually....though its kinda difficult to admit it....im feelin kinda lonely n sad!! i mean i hope u understand!! kno wt?? when i saw my previous post...i felt so happy. at last all tht was out from my mind. n it looked so preety on the page. white on black. I love black. It absolutely turns me on!! U might think im weird, but trust me, im not!! why does black always remind u of sadness, gloom and death?? Kno wt black reminds me of?? Of a beutiful black mini dress!! or maybe the beautiful sky alight with stars....and sooooo many dreams like those stars!! Far, yet not unachievable!! Even a gorgeous saree studded with diamonds!! Black- the colour of power. Black- the ultimate colour.
nyway...wt was i sayin?? yeah...im feelin lonely. actually im goin thru dis dilemmna about wt to do wid my life?? i mean my parents expect me to get married some yrz down the line and probably i will....eventually. But what abt nw?? im doin my masters in Management wid a specialisation in IT coz thts wht my dad thought i cud do....so basically im here fulfillin my dad's dreams!! Not tht i mind as long as the job pays!! But wt abt my dreamz?? Whr r they?? I mean....shit man!! The only thing i can do is talk...n maybe write. If i belong anywhr in the sphere of management its HR, defintely not IT...i dunno jackshit abt IT. But i dont wanna quit. I dont wanna see his dreams goin dwn the drain....its jus not done!! But thn...wht abt me?? See wht i mean?? GOD!!! am i upset!!


Shit!! I dont even know why i am doing this...Infact was feeling damn bored so logged onto the net. This thing led to that and i suddenly remembered of this iste i used to post in when i was in school, it was freshlimesoda.com but i couldnt find it nywhr. Searchd google for it, one thing let to another n here i am....writing!! Of all things...writing!! Shit man...i hate this thing with the same obsession tht i love it!! I mean its a kind of DIY pack fr me. ur happy? Write. Ur sad? Write. Bored? Write. Nonplussed? Write. I mean nything you feel.......Write. Jus scribble scribble and scribble. First behind those rough notebooks, then at the back of school copies, later in your personal diary, back of calender, sms outbox, laptop...........dosent matter...jus keep on writing!! Atleast it will keep me sane!!
Nw abt my name. Why krystaleyez u ask?? well...i cudnt have cared more if it was crystal....but thn 'c'rystal wasnt available n i had to take up 'k'rystal. Its another defect i was born with apart from my obsession about writing. I cant lie. Trust me, i try. I really o coz at times the situations demand it. But then...my eyes gimme away.....pointing out and screaming to the world "shez a liar"
As i said a few moments ago....in the firstplace i dont even kno y im writin dis shit!! Well....fr one, i bunked my insti 2day which may not have been a good idea but i was damn upset last nyt (dont ask me reasons coz i havent got any) and ended up standing by the window till 4.30am. And trust me Ranchi is cold. So.....under obvious circumstances woke up wid an obvious fever n a splittin headache. N herez whr it lands me?? F***
To be frank im a little upset nw too.....y does life always tend to make a mess of itself man?? Coward did u call me?? No way!! Im not jus talkin abt myself. Look around...its the same wid eveyone...i mean frget everyone luk at urself fr chrissake!!
nyway....will pen off nw...i guess have already taken out all my steam on the poor laptop. I pity it at times....seems like the modern counterpart of the ancient whip to me, it does!! I punish others with my caustic tongue, but for me?? Only written words will do!!